Life is changing and shifting.

I have a new family. A partner’s feelings to consider.

Both of us have moved from an individualistic lifestyle to thinking about our lives as a couple.

As much as I say that I’m ready to get married, am I really?

Yes I am, and I just had a conversation with my fiancé about what kind of boundaries we’ll need to set with our families since brown families are very involved in each other’s lives.

Knowing how to set boundaries and having the space to make decisions about our lives separate from our parents is something that will require special attention.

It seems like it’ll be a struggle as brown families are very close knit and sometimes tend to overstep into newly married couples’ lives. Which is fair in itself if you think about it in a bigger picture.

We’re in our 20’s and marriage is a huge thing and if we aren’t given the guidance to navigate through it, it can cause problems in the long run so I get where the elders are coming from but then again, being involved in newly married couples lives is a societal issue.

I’m very close to my mother so she’s been involved in most of my decision making in life.

I am the younger one in my household and that automatically comes with more benefits such as not having to or not being able to make my own decisions in life regarding any topic which doesn’t sound all that great but that’s just the direction my life took and I’ve been a passenger in my parents car and it’s time for me to step out and take a stand in the things that I want to do with my partner based on what suits our lives best.

How that transition will happen is beyond me and how I’ll manage to take that step seems like such a foreign concept to me. It will require me to step out of my comfort zone which I desperately want to because that’s what my partner requires of me which is fair.

I can’t be indifferent to the things that are happening in my life anymore, I need to be assertive. That’s just what the next chapter holds.

I feel like I’m so in over my head that I don’t know which direction to navigate in.

Things will work out just fine as long as there’s open communication between the two of us Ojala.



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Sometimes I’ll start a sentence, and I don’t even know where it’s going. I just hope I find it along the way — Micheal Scott