I’m tired and exhausted and I’ve hit a wall.

Just a note — None of this suggests that I’m unhappy in my marriage. We’re doing great, I’m just stuck.

I'm struggling.

Struggling to be more empathetic.

Struggling to be more expressive.

Struggling to be more involved.

More, more, more. Maybe I'm just not enough.

Maybe I’ll never be enough. My heart feels heavy and I feel anxious.

I want to give myself a hug but will that heal the part of me where my therapist didn't take me seriously, the person that I loved cheated on me, the person who I thought was perfect turned out to be a fraud.

Though that fraud did lead to me someone better, someone sane, someone who loves me endlessly, someone who accepts my flaws yet someone who just wants more and more from me.

He’s not wrong for wanting me to be more expressive. I understand his thought process.

What will heal me? Maybe the tears running down my face right now?

I'm glad my partner isnt home right now because I want to cry. My heart is heavy.

Maybe I’ll just never be enough for him. Maybe this is just me.

Maybe I just need to get on with it.